The Art of being Playful

*Each blog post is interactive and includes a free playsheet to download at the end.

Let’s Talk About Playful Flirting

Flirting is a playful way to convey interest in another person. It is lighthearted, and does not have a high cost of admission. If you flirt with someone and they don’t flirt back, you haven’t faced a big rejection. Maybe they didn’t pick up on your signs, aren’t interested, or are focused on something else.

I think of flirting as a fun way to practice erotic confidence.

There is a not-so-fine line between flirting and paying unwanted attention or making sexual advances someone doesn’t care to receive. Flirting can be a way to test the waters before taking it the next step.

When flirting, you want to convey interest, without making the other person feel awkward.

The best flirting techniques are the simplest.

How to Be Successful at Playful Flirting

Everyone can be successful when it comes to flirting – you just have to know what you’re doing.

Types of Flirting Signals

Express Your Confidence – One of the most effective ways to playfully flirt with anyone is to express your confidence. People are naturally drawn to confident people. If you conduct yourself in a confident manner, flirting will become second nature and people will be drawn to your charismatic charm.

Speak with Your Eyes – We’ve all heard the cliché, “The eyes are the doorway to the soul.” In many ways, it is true. There is something intimate about looking into someone else’s eyes, and it is among one of the best ways to flirt. When you hold eye contact with your gaze, you can make a strong connection with another person.

Be Forward and Hands-On – Within reason, being forward and hands-on is your ticket to becoming an expert in playful flirting. We say within reason because you do not want to overstep boundaries and touch anyone inappropriately or without their consent. However, a mischievous light arm touch or a playful tap of the hand will go far towards successful flirting.

Genuinely Compliment – If you are interested in them, observe them. Maybe you like the way their eyes sparkle when they’re talking about a topic or hobby they are passionate about. Or perhaps you think the way they say something is cute. Whatever it may be, find something you truly adore and give them a genuine compliment. Everyone loves a good compliment, and this is an expert way to flirt.

Don’t Be Afraid to Tease – Teasing doesn’t always have to be a form of foreplay. It is an excellent tool used in playful flirting. Playful flirting examples using teasing could include making a lighthearted joke about something they said that you find amusing.

Let’s Practice How to Playfully Flirt

Feel into the part of you that is excited about connection. Feel into the part of you that is sexy.

Smile at someone and hold their eye contact a moment longer than you would with your boss, a teacher, or a family member with whom you are clearly NOT flirting.

Start talking. You can just start with a simple “hi!”

Initiate a conversation. Ask the other person a question about something you notice about them. “That’s a great hat! What’s the story with it?”

Compliment the other person early in the conversation.

Keep it light.

Use body language to communicate your intentions. Open relaxed arms and stance, turn towards them. Subtle movements that convey interest.

Laugh if they say anything remotely amusing, and see if you can gently get them to laugh. Laughter connects people.

Questions to Ask Yourself:

Do you limit your flirtiness only to people that you are sexually attracted to?

Do you believe flirting has any gendered rules?

Suggested Practice:

You can flirt with anyone. Flirting does not have to be sexual in context. Rather, it’s a light-hearted invitation into gentle play. Try flirting with babies, dogs, trees, clouds. Try flirting with your grandma. Get good at bringing your playful energy forward through many encounters.

Next Steps:

Download our free PDF below that helps you practice your flirting!

Flirting doesn’t necessarily have any agenda behind it, although it can. If you’d like support taking it from flirting to something more, like getting a date, download our free worksheet with tips and tricks for moving a flirt forward.

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